My Little Mademoiselle

Ma chérie,
my little mademoiselle.
Who flies like a fairy,
who leaps like a gazelle.

Soaring innocence, so pure.
boasting elegance, so mature.
Springing gently on your feet,
going up for the next suite.

Though now, she is a mademoiselle no more.
She is the majesty, the royal honour.

Forgive me, your honour, am I not worthy for your time?

You think that you are sitting on a gold throne,
but you are sitting on your tombstone.
Look at you, thinking that you’re surrounded by sandstones,
when those walls around you are made from bones.

You left your home for a castle,
but you are in a shambles.
In your world, you’re a royal highness,
but the real world knows you’re a royal mess.

You are the queen of your own world.

Oh honey, wake up and see.
You are no queen to me.
Hiding yourself in a castle for few,
no one really knows the real you.

Maybe that would be the best,
because the world will know you are truly messed.
Never an honest word,
do you think you will rule the world?

Let me rip that sweet veneer,
I know who you are, my dear.
Even if you say everyone is your family,
oh we know that’s a blasphemy.

You blame the world for its error,
when it’s clearly reflected in your mirror.

___________________________________________
Once you go there was never, never an honest word.

My Little Mademoiselle

Wide Awake

Lying on the edge of my bed, I breathe.
Looking at the time, oh what time is it?
It’s 4:16 am and I am wide awake.
Staring at the ceiling, oh what is it?

Blink. Blink. Blink.

Wait, was it all a dream or is this real?
It was like a dream, that’s what I feel.
A long dream, or was it even a nightmare?
I don’t even have anymore thoughts to spare.

Blink. Blink. Blink.

The ceiling fan spinning at a constant speed.
Well, not like what we had when we started.
Even my heartbeat was at a constant speed.
Well, not like what I felt when we started.

Blink. Blink. Blink.

Gripping the blanket tightly,
forcing myself to go to sleep.
I can’t even make myself weep,
just staring the ceiling continuously.

Blink. Blink. Blink.

Ha. You disgust me.
There, I said it.
I scoffed.
Wow. You disgust me.

Blink. Blink. Blink.

Oh hey let’s see what time it is.
It’s 4:26 am and I am wide awake.
How long are you gonna keep this?
Hup, hup, come on it’s time to wake.

Wakey, wakey.
______________________________
“I know the truth now,
I know who you are,
and I don’t love you anymore,”
– Evanescence “Everybody’s Fool”

Wide Awake

One/Free

I can hear the chains clanking off my back,
my wings are still weak but I still remember how to fly.
I swear I felt like I was about to die,
but now I will fly far and never look back.

The gust of air screams freedom,
and once again, I could be me.
But there is still something that bothers me,
and prevents me from enjoying this freedom.

I want to rip that sweet facade off your face.

Everyone was right, I didn’t belong there,
but I could fly home now.
I wanted to keep my vow,
to be with you I chose to stay there.

But god I was dying.
I floated but the air was still suffocating.

Those sweet, sweet promises,
chained me to the lands of uncertainty.
Those sweet, sweet kisses,
locked me to the heart of improbability.

The pain is still there from the chains,
but I can breathe again now.
I guess I was right,
I had to wait for you to unleash the chains.

I’m no slave, I’m free.
Was that how you wanted to treat me?
Fuck, I guess I was a slave to your love,
oh that’s right, wasn’t that how we began, love?

Funny how our world never was and never will be.
No matter how much I wished for it to be.
Through heaven and hell I went back,
but no, this time I’m not going back.

Let me live in my freedom.
__________________________________________
And let me laugh through my red lips.

One/Free

Your Fool

That beautiful facade,
I foolishly fell in love with.
Oh, honey, I am a fool.
But god damn it I’m your fool.

I look in the mirror and I laugh,
“How did you get so far off?”
So far deep, deep down,
wearing the fool’s crown?

Laugh, laugh, laugh.
Admit it, this is funny.

Your chaos behind your facade.
How much time do you have before you fall apart?

Accept it, this is a domino game.
The stack of cards won’t stop falling over.
If you seriously think this is a game,
shouldn’t it be time that it’s game over?

If I have a question to ask more,
do you even know yourself anymore?
_____________________________________
“Without the mask,
where will you hide?
Can’t find yourself,
lost in your lies,”
– Evanescence “Everybody’s Fool”

Your Fool