My steps are heavy,
dragging across the land that is muddy,
soft rain trickles on me,
it bothers but I let it be.
In this seemingly endless wetlands,
no map of some sort in my hands,
just a bottle of water,
and faith that cannot falter.
For the flower on the precipice,
that brings me happiness.
It has a familiar appearance,
but unseen with the eyes.
For the flower that is mine
I just need a sign,
She worked a job with no past experience,
no university degrees to help her excel,
devoting her life to raise good people,
trying to make just a little difference.
She’s a human being with flaws,
but she’s only doing her best.
She always says she is blessed,
because she has me as her cause.
We agree on some things,
about people and spreading kindness.
We disagree on many things,
about the world and about ourselves.
Emotions are hard to keep,
even though we try hard to ignore.
In silence she did not weep,
but the weight of pain in her eyes she bore.
In her flaws she is still perfection,
as no one could have done her job better than her.
She guided me in to the right direction,
even though I end up in a different place from her.
In her eyes there was still disappointment,
not of me, but of herself.
Despite her flaws, she did nothing wrong,
and there are no reasons for me to be gone.
She is weeping silently through her eyes,
but I only pray to God, someday please bring back her smile.
Even if the rest of my life is an atonement
for breaking her heart.
Hey there, little girl.
You may think you’re not doing well,
and the world is going against you.
Keep holding on,
you will get there.
It won’t be an easy path,
you will have your heart ripped out,
broken into pieces,
to the point you feel numb.
You will learn to fight,
and to let go.
They can forcibly take your flower crown,
but don’t let them take your innocence.
The dripping noise of the rain feels longing,
the warmth of the bed sheet that feels half missing.
The rain lulls me to sleep tonight,
with an umbrella that is the moonlight.
I long for the milky rain,
the one we dont need an umbrella for.
Nothing says love more than
simply being there
for someone who is crying their insecurities out on the floor
at 3 A.M.
bearing their pain
that is silence broken by the sound of their tears
knowing that this won’t be their last breakdown
and you choose to stay.
attraction brings you in,
but love makes you stay
A quarter century passed in a blink of an eye.
Laughter, sweat, and tears became impossible to count.
But even with the uncountable arguments, heartbreaks, and tearful nights,
I have received even more blessings, joy, and love.
Because from birth, the greatest gift I have ever received is love.
“What would you like to get as your birthday gift?”
The thing is I never prepared an answer for this.
A gift is a sincere thought.
That the gifter sees this item and thought,
“she will love this” or “this is just the thing for her”
The best part of receiving a gift is the suspense as you open the wrapping,
wondering what this person decided to give.
It could range from anything cheap and useful, to something branded and expensive.
But you would never know unless you decide to open the wrapping.
I have asked God for many gifts,
many gifts that He decided not to give.
Not because He did not want to give,
but because He has a better gift.
A gift that He knew would be just the best for me.
A gift that was unexpected when I unwrapped it, but God knew that I will love.
A gift that God knew that I will take care of.
A gift that will last a lifetime.
An early birthday gift for me,
is the day you were born.
Two imperfect pieces,
with different grooves and edges.
Each were not broken nor incomplete,
each were perfectly neat.
Where one was lacking, the other had more,
and in that empty space, they meet.
Like the perfect snug, they fit.
No need to search for a missing piece anymore.
Put together, pulled apart through time,
and distance that is far.
No matter how pulled apart they are,
they will be put together in time.
Because they are the imperfect pieces that fit perfectly only with each other.
And when they are together, everything makes sense again.
Have I ever told you why I hate closing my eyes and sleep?
Because I can reach out to you when I’m awake
When the nightmares are chasing me,
it’s easy to wake up because you are my reality
I used to live in the field of dreams,
but the reality is better than what it seems
Because you are there
I’m lying awake,
afraid of what will show up if I close my eyes.
I’m lying awake,
because I want to see you again.
Si vis amari, ama.
Perfection, flawless, impeccable.
Unrealistic and unattainable.
Mistakes and flaws.
Gripping my heart like claws.
Until when will I punish myself?
This perfection obsession,
hazed my reflection.
Is the mirror dirty or is my brain cloudy?
The more I avoid making mistakes,
the more I make mistakes.
What do I do after the mistakes are made?
Acknowledge and learn.
I’m perfection in my imperfection.